Sunday, October 14, 2007

The eternal dilemma

Career v/s Family. Professional life v/s personal life. The head v/s the heart. This is an unending battle. And one for which I don't have any answer. I ask people. Friends, family, profs. Everyone has their own answer. True to the saying "Grass is greener on the other side of the fence", several people suggest a course of action opposed to the one they took when faced with the similar dilemma. "Don't compromise on your career, you'll regret it later", "Career may be important, but doesn't mean you neglect family life", "This is the time you build your career. Parents will come around eventually", "Parents are the only people who stick with you till the end. Don't disappoint them", "True Love is hard to find. Don't let go of it", "Don't compromise too much for Love. If it doesn't work, you'll regret giving up so much for it. You'll feel cheated". The views are varied and generally take extreme stands.

Read this amazingly good book called "Tuesdays with Morrie" recently. One of the best books I read of late and, must say, one that had significant influence on me. Made me realize that career is not my entire life. It's just a part of it. There's more to my life than my career. Chasing a career by compromising on everything else will also leave me empty. The right thing to do is to strike a balance. A few compromises on the career front, a few on the personal - to lead a well balanced life :D But sadly not everything in life is a balanced equation.

Sometimes you come to a fork in the road. To choose one road - and one alone - is a must. What if both the roads are equally attractive at the first glance? Choosing one means you sure give up on the other. Maybe forever. Difficult decision. Very difficult decision. In such situations, I remember what two of my best friends told me - Prati and Rashmi.

Prati said - It's all about priority. There's nothing 'right', nothing 'wrong'. Everything might seem attractive. But what You want the most, at that point, is what matters.

Rashmi said the same, in slightly different words. She said - What will most likely happen is that you'll make an instantaneous decision when you come to your bridges. And that's not bad at all. Just don't look back, if you can. Treasure the past, but accept that it will never be the same again and look up, look ahead and make the future the way you want it to be, as of now. Tomorrow you may want something else...sure, why not?! Just be happy, be in the present!

Saw this lovely Vodafone ad today that gives the right perspective of seeing Life -
"The may fly lives for just one day. But does this make him miserable? Not one bit. Coz in those few hours, he crams every moment full of the things he loves. He soars . He swoops. He sails. Maybe there's a lesson in this for us longer living creatures. Just think. If we embrace Life, like the Mayfly, what a life that would be!" Make the most of Now!

That's what I shall do- make the most of Now. Tomorrow is just another day.


Sid said...

hmm.... know what... living in the now without caring about tomorrow
is like going on a long drive... without caring to stop for petrol, citing the reason that the drive is what is more important.... eventually it catches up with us;
we are out of gas before we reach our destination... the future shall go on to become now sooner or later... and it's worth planning for that soon... at least that's what i feel

Bastet said...

True, the future is worth planning for, but when do u stop planning and start living? When the future becomes today, there would be a fresh 'future' to worry about. I dont say "Dont plan" but "dont plan only" . Live as well.

Making the most of Now - is going on the trip that you always wanted to go on but kept putting off to tomo due to reasons ever so many. You always have a fuel gauge to see when the gas is about to run out.

Dont be so caught up in ur worry for the future that u forget to live today. Take the car out, baby! :D

Sid said...

Agreed. Then why is the conclusion "That's what I shall do- make the most of Now. Tomorrow is just another day."? Why doesn't it reflect this attitude? I would rather have it "The right thing to do is to strike a balance. A few compromises on the career front, a few on the personal - to lead a well balanced life :D"

Nissim said...

a little over a year ago i had a similar choice to make...might not have been as tough as the one you have but similar nonetheless.
and i am still undecided about whether i am happy abt the way it has come thru.
John Lennon said:
" Life is what happens while you are busy making plans for it."
Figure out your bridges now, and when you come to them, cross one and burn the others.

Found this link on Aarthi's blog.